PwnTalk

The omniscient and omnipotent Chuck Norris only puts up with lame recycled facts about him because they keep him trending on Twitter. Of course he would roundhouse kick heads off if any of them were not true, so with that in mind we have compiled a list of the most important tweets about Mr. Norris, done extensive research in to their validity and present to you the final results:

• Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
• Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands and when he came back they were just called The Islands.
• Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo Is in hiding.
• When Chuck Norris jumps into a pool he doesn’t get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris.
• 
  Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a “Who has more testicles?” contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
• Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
• Brokeback Mountain isn’t just a movie.. Its also the name of the pile of dead pirates in Chuck Norris’s back yard.
• Chuck Norris does not poke on Face Book he Stabs!
• Chuck Norris is currently suing myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
• 
  Chuck Norris doesn’t need twitter. He’s already following you.