T-shirts are great because they can say what you have always wanted to say, but lack the moral courage (balls) to say. The key to a great t-shirt isn’t the message, but the PLACEMENT. Like real estate, location is the key to having a great tee with a message that really gets what you want to say off your chest without getting your ass beaten.
For the Twitter Nation (What are you doing right now!?)
* Front Side: Tweet!
* Back Side: RT @aplusk Fbk sux.Rly Rly sux.
For Facebook Users (Which Giraffe Spot Pattern are you?!)
* Front Side: Meet new friends every day!
* Back Side: Twitterers are too ugly for Facebook.
For MySpace Friends (Get this t-shirt, and save the planet!)
* Front Side: I’m a single mother and a home school parent!
* Back Side: My home schooled 8-year-old just fragged your college sophomore in Halo 3.
For Match.com Daters (Upload a picture, and get more responses!)
* Front Side : Looking for friendship first!
* Back Side: I’m not drunk enough to even call you, much less talk to you. Yet.
For World of Warcraft players (Nah. Most of you play in your underwear anyhow. Skip the T-shirts. And the bathing. And the entire month of July. WoW>IRL.)
For Democrats (Yeah, you won the election. Now go after those Republican assholes and rub it in.)
* Front Side: “Obama/Biden: A Dream for America
* Back side : “McCain/Palin: A Nightmare for Anyone with an IQ over 20.
* Front Side: It Is Time For Change!
* Back Side : McCain Should Have Dumped That Bitch While He Had A Chance.
* Front Side : Obama Nation!
* Back Side : Deport All Republicans To Iraq!
For Republicans (It was a tough election cycle. Show the Democrats how you really feel.)
* Front Side : Hockey Mom’s Unite!
* Back Side : Single Mom’s Don’t Vote!
* Front Side : McCain/Palin 2012
* Back SIde : Hitler/Stalin 2012. Vote Democratic!
* Front Side : Freedom Has A Price.
* Back Side : So do Democratic Congressmen. Purchase One Today!
For the Recently Divorced Male
* Front Side : I Love My Children!
* Back Side : I Hate Paying that Soul-Sucking Bitch Every Month!
For the Recently Divorced Female
* Front Side: Single Mothers Unite!
* Back Side: Don’t talk to me about your Erectile Dysfunction, you pathetic shell of a man.
Keep in mind, someone will see the back of your t-shirt. Remain calm. Explain to the potential agressor that 1) it is just a t-shirt someone gave you, and you haven’t actually read the back of it, or 2) wear a jacket over the tshirt, and only wear it in private like the wimp you actually are. Either way, you win!
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