PwnTalk

13Nov08 Self Defense Techniques for the IRL Challenged

From time to time, according to different blog sites it is a good idea to walk outside the house and participate in society by going shopping, driving an automobile, and speaking to other human beings without hitting the Enter key. When these moments occur, it is imperative to remember two things. First of all, no one cares about your level 61 DK set. Secondly, you have to protect yourself against the huddled masses that defy meta description. Here is a list for the Facebook spammer, the MySpace uploader, and the WoW addict that will come in handy if the need arises for face time confrontation with wetware.

Fl;sn;s;bs <target>;fl;sn; c heal. This does not work. You cannot stack commands in real life.
Running away from a fight is a lot more efficient than reforming yourself to back/center.
If this person is trying to beat your ass, it is not a good time to ask to join his clan. Walk/run away.

1 Comment Posted by admin in How To
Tagged chuck norris, ninjas

31Oct08 How to Give Yourself an iMakeover on Facebook

Be edgy. Pick 5-6 indie bands, preferably emo, and post links to their websites. Never visit the actual sites or listen to their music, but be ready for the influx of girls who like to cut themselves.
Instantly wtfpwn someone politically, and delete their retort. Cut and paste, and send to your “real” friends. If you don’t have real friends, just send to yourself and bask in remembered glory.
How to meet girls. Play Vampire Wars or Fashion Wars, kick their asses, and then invite them to join your clan. Upgrade your friends from a bunch of ugly dudes to a huge stack of beautiful Goth women.
Sign on as the opposite sex, with corresponding hot photo. Meet members of the same sex, and destroy them in front of their friends (”It was a little small, and I had to finish alone” is the death bringer).
Start your own Facebook group. Make sure you don’t have your mother as one of your friends, otherwise, you are going to be miserable come face time.

No Comments Posted by admin in How To
Tagged facebook, imakeover

27Sep08 If you’re afraid of confrontation, say it with a T-shirt!

T-shirts are great because they can say what you have always wanted to say, but lack the moral courage (balls) to say. The key to a great t-shirt isn’t the message, but the PLACEMENT. Like real estate, location is the key to having a great tee with a message that really gets what you want to say off your chest without getting your ass beaten.

For the Twitter Nation (What are you doing right now!?)

* Front Side: Tweet!

* Back Side: RT @aplusk Fbk sux.Rly Rly sux.

For Facebook Users (Which Giraffe Spot Pattern are you?!)

* Front Side: Meet new friends every day!

* Back Side: Twitterers are too ugly for Facebook.

No Comments Posted by admin in How To
Tagged tshirts